Ready or Not. . .

Well, Hailyn will be born in just a couple days- Today is Monday and I am going in at 6AM on Wednesday. I have to tell you, I am getting very nervous about the delivery! It has not been long since I have done it, so the memories are fresh in my mind- which is a good and bad thing- the aftermath is what I am worried about the most. The logistics of it all- Having a one year old whom demands attention from Mommy ( and I am so willing to give it) and a newborn who needs the same, and trying to heal all at the same time. The first 2 weeks are my main concern- when you feel the worst. I worry about Ayla. She has never been away from me. I know she will be all right, she has Grandma and Daddy, but... It makes me sad. I have never been away from her as well. So, the hospital stay is going to be tough for me. I do not want to put Ayla out . . . I think the most time consuming thing is going to be breastfeeding- Seriously around the clock! This is the main thing that enters my mind- this and the no sleep :) I think when you are not pregnant- your body just does what it needs to do- you may be exhausted, but some how, you make it through the days with no problem. I guess I will soon find out! Maybe it will go more smoothly than I am imagining? I just do not want my daughter, Ayla, to get shafted... I think she is the one who is going to need the most attention whenever I can possibly give it! I think she will be a fantastic big sister, she is so loving and gentle with babies. It is happening whether I think I am ready or not. I have been feeling very excited- It has not been real to me that I am actually having another baby- that in a couple days I will actually be holding my daughter! I cannot wait to see what she is going to look like. To look at the tiny fingers and toes- To smell her- So exciting!